CrimLaw

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A defense attorney's nightmare. Defendant commits an inexcuseable act and videotapes it. And then there's a jury trial.

I've never had a client so stupid as to videotape a rape. I did represent one of three white kids who videotaped themselves getting drunk, calling each other "n*gg*r alot, then talking about how they were going to mess up this other "n*gg*r (another white kid), then taping themselves chasing this kid (the kid gets away when they chase him thru the diamond of an ongoing police softball league game and the police stop the chasers and send them on their way). Later that same night, on the same video they taped themselves breaking into a house in the middle of the night and beating the living tar out of some guy because they are trying to find out where their intended victim was located (they never did catch him). Of course, the police got ahold of the tape. And even more perfectly, the case gets assigned to the one black lady who sits as a judge in the jurisdiction. She's a fair judge but conservative and not likely to put with this kind of silliness. The question was whether she would look down from the bench and find this group of idjut wannabes funny or . . .

Thank God for plea agreements.

Some of the best parts of this story cannot be told because of attorney-client privilege. However, let me say in general that there are a fair number of white kids running around out there now using this word to refer to one another (and their black friends as well). When I try to explain to them why an older black judge might not appreciate the word** they just look at me like I am the most out of touch old guy they've ever met.

** As an aside, I have not seen disproportionate treatment of these young, white, male idjuts by black judges. White judges, on the other hand - "We don't put up with this kind of asinine behavior in ###### county anymore. You see that officer, that deputy, and that lawyer? You've insulted them all and they all are men of respect. [insert heavy penalty here]." This is not a direct quote but it's representative of several lectures I've heard defendants receive.