1) In Australia Santa can't call anyone a "Ho" anymore.
2) You're not supposed to break into a jail to get sex.
3) Teaching the family business: theft.
4) Ah, yes, the good old fashioned flower pot - porsche theft technique.
5) No, he's not a smart thief if he kept a diary.
6) Don't be a bike rustler in Kibaale - they will kill you.
7) Wales: Heroin leads to coffee theft.
8) Overstealing money for college.
9) Stealing from the bereaved - deserves to be caught by those ironworkers.
10) The ever-popular "I steal, but I don't kill" defense.
11) Somebody must have a really big cat.
12) A parking meter under your coat just might prove conspicuous.
13) Stealing Eucharist - pretty sure that's a one way ticket.